Parenting Week # 3

"It is not good for man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him."

Genesis 2:18

This weeks reading resources: Growing Kids Gods Way by Gary & Anne Marie Ezzo chapter 2

Main points for me:

When there is harmony in the husband-wife relationship, there is an infused stability in the family.

Principles to guide your family

By God's design husband & wife relationship is the first social relationship established in Scripture

By God's design husband & wife relationship is primary in the network of dependent relationships (much of child's basic security depends on what he observes between mom and dad. Went he sees love and affection he feels more secure.

husband & wife relationship must be viewed as the priority relationship in family

all other family relationships are subject to husband & wife relationship. (parental authority is God-given and necessary to enforce God's moral law in the life of a child. Structure and order are important to child development.

child centered parenting creates problems

separates husband & wife relationship and Scripture says "What God has joined together let no man separate" Mark 10:9

reverses the natural process of moral development by prematurely creating a false sense of self- reliance. (child thinks they are self-sufficient before they have established the needed self-control. Self-reliance without self-discipline is dangerous for children

child centered parenting fosters family independence not family interdependence (robs the child the opportunity to learn to invest)

magnifies the natural conflict between the natural way of the child and his need for moral conformity

can be close to idolatry (child's happiness greater goal than his holiness) God not the child needs to be the center of the family universe.

Achieving a Balance and meeting needs.

Life does not stop when we have children (just slow down)

Date night a good idea

Do special things for each other as well as the children

Invite friends over and have children help prepare things (learning to serve others)

Couch time- kid's see mom and dad together enjoying each others company

Observations in our home

we have improved greatly in our parenting skills as we are learning a more Biblical based way of parenting but there is still so much work to be done and room for improvement (baby steps)

This one was tougher for me because I began my parenting as a child centered parent. I did not know anything else. All I knew was that I was terrified and so I needed to hold on to those children with every once of my life energy so they did not get hurt. Well I have learned that doing anything with my strength my way hurts myself and those I love. Even when I am doing it with all the good intentions of my heart. Hmmm let me reflect on this for a moment my pettily human strength vs. God's omni-everything uhh which one would I choose for these children I Love so dearly-I guess it is a no brain er eh.
I am slowly healing from my lack of abilities and Christ is guiding us to all He has for this family. The children are such terrific troopers and God's Grace is truly amazing. So much to learn! Thank you Jesus for the opportunity to grow in Your ways for they really are the only safe place in this world and eternity.

"Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved—you and your household." Acts 16:31